Couple Wellness

The Best BDSM Collars and Leashes for All Types of Kinky Play

You belong to the BDSM community, and you wish to own something that will symbolize it. A collar is perfect for that! Besides, it will match your kinky relationship. Great, but how to find the right one? Well, you must know the difference between diverse types. Then you should know all features. Yup, there are plenty of things to consider, so we better start explaining! Find out all about the best BDSM collars and leashes for all types of kinky play!

What Is The Deal About Collars?

You already know this – collars are an accessory that goes around the neck. And we often connect them with pets since we use them on our dogs, for example, to restrain them from running, protect them or show ownership over them. Now, you can assume why they are perfect for BDSM couples! The wearer will become collared, and the Dom will have power over them. Further, they can use it for all types of naughty play.

Collars are available in multiple varieties, including the models with extensions for a leash, rope, etc.

All About Materials And Colors

So, you never had a collar before, and you are unsure which to pick. The safe bet would be a best seller: a black model made of leather.

Typically, it will be adaptable, and it will come with soft padding and soft edges. That will ensure comfortable wear! The width will be about two or three inches.

Now, let’s speak about the material! The list is pretty long: faux leather, ribbon, suede, metal, plastic, rubber, etc. The same goes with colors – it can be any you can think of.

The collar may represent some deep meaning for you, but you can choose some just because of the aesthetics. In conclusion: buy the one you like. But, make sure you are not allergic to the material, of course.

So, What Do Collars Represent?

To simplify, we can say that collars indicate ownership of the sub. Or say it better, the superiority of the dominant partner. Although, in a BDSM relationship, that symbol is romantic and means commitment.

But, you should know that it goes deeper than this and that collars symbolize various things to different people. It all depends on your needs, likings, and cravings – there are no prescribed norms.

These are some of the possible meanings:

  1. Loyalty – it may show to others that you are in a committed relationship
  2. Reward – the Dom can gift it to the Sub for behaving well
  3. Security – The Sub may wear it to feel protected in a relation
  4. Humilation – The Sub could wear it because they enjoy sexual humiliation

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Types of BDSM Leashes

The most important thing to be aware of is that different collars do not have the same purpose. Okay, if you wear it at home, meaning does not matter so much. But if you will wear it in public, you want to state the correct thing. Plus, whatever collar you are wearing, you must put your safety first! That is, it should not stop you from breathing.

#1 Slave Collars and Submissive Leashes

This model may be called protection collars or ownership collars, depending on the dynamic between lovers.

You can wear it at any event, and it will state the ownership between Dominant and Submissive. So, everyone will know that you are not available but in a relationship.

The main difference between this one and a play collar is the duration of wear. The play collar you wear only during a sexual act. And slave collar you can wear all the time.

How to choose the perfect submissive collar? Well, it should be:

  1. Widely noticeable
  2. Cozy to wear
  3. It is a bonus if it has an extension for adding a leash

#2 Play Leashes

Play collars are less formal than slave collars since you wear them only during playtime. Basically, it is like another costume item,  usually for a submissive partner. And it shows who is having a lead and who is following.

Which play collar is the good one? The good one will be:

  1. Comfy for wearing
  2. The bonus is if it has an extension for adding a leash

#3 Day Leashes

Are you in a 24/7 style Dominant/submissive relationship? I am not speaking only about sex but all-day activities. If yes, this might be the proper fit for you. The one who wears it will feel owned and secure. But the collar will not be noticeable to other people since it is smaller and looks like regular neckless – so not everyone will know you are part of the BDSM scene.

What should you pay attention to while buying one? Your day collar should be:

  1. Cozy
  2. Match your personality
  3. Look like adequate jewelry at work or any public place

#4 Pet Roleplay Leashes

Pet collars compare to dog or cat collars. Most likely, it is made from nylon or leather. But it might also have metal spikes.

Typically, people wear them only during roleplay and not through daily activities. But you might be surprised to know that they do not have to imply ownership! You can wear it during alone playtime, without having an Owner.

The perfect pet collar will:

  1. Look fun
  2. Have an extension for adding a leash

#5 Posture Leashes

Posture collars are a special kind of collars. People wear them during a scene or as part of training in a 24/7 Dominant/submissive relationship.

It is crucial to remember that they are not for long wear! They aid in keeping the head up so that the head and back stay straight.

Be mindful that your posture collar:

  1. Is not unbearable to wear even if it is not fully comfortable
  2. Cannot cause choking

Related Article: ” What Is A Ball Gag? How to Use Them? and Anything Else You Must Know

The Guide To Finding The Right Fit For Your BDSM collar:

  1. The wearer must measure a neck – a looser collar goes with a larger size, and a close-fitting collar goes with a smaller size
  2. Be careful if you are allergic to the material
  3. Get an adjustable collar if you are known for getting or losing weight
  4. Try it on before playing to see if it is comfortable

The Guide To Finding The Right Style For Your BDSM collar:

  1. A submissive partner is the one that picks – after all, they wear it
  2. Consider if you want it to be noticeable to others or not
  3. Thick material like chains might be fantastic for someone, but not for you
  4. Black leather is the most popular, but someone prefers ribbon

Leash Commands

Did you ever train a dog? Please, forget about all the rules! When it comes to a human leash, it is all different. Tugging and jerking are encouraging here. Are you feeling lost now? Do not worry! I will explain to you basic techniques!

What you should do is:

  1. Pull a leash firmly toward down to tell your partner to kneel
  2. Pull a leash firmly toward up to tell your partner to move up
  3. Pull a leash firmly toward you to say them to get closer
  4. A slight jerk to the front tells your partner to walk in front of you
  5. Raise the hand with the leash in it with the open palm to show your partner you want them to stop
  6. Lower your hand with the leash in it to order them to stay
  7. Lower your hand with the leash in it with two fingers facing the ground to make your partner heel

Consideration About Public Play

Any BDSM play, including leash training, in public, pulls many controversies. Thus, BDSM members often do it only at home to avoid discrimination and negative stereotypes. So, how to do it in public?

One way is invisileash! You do not really wear a leash, but you imagine as you do, and then sub is allowed to walk freely but only three feet from the dom.

Another way is a wrist leash. The leash is super short and goes from the hand of the dom to the wrist of the sub. So, you can walk around without anyone noticing what you are doing!

You might be interested in our article ” What is BDSM Dungeon Gear? The Best Bondage Furniture. A Guide to BDSM Sex

How Does It Feel To Be Collared?

At this point, you know how the collar is used. But you did not put it on yet, so you are unsure how it feels around the neck. If it is too tight, you could get a claustrophobic sensation. And if it is too loose, it could be less influential.

Still, this does not explain how it actually feels! To be collared it might feel spiritual, even therapeutic. How so? Once a person starts wearing it, they could feel more than ever as they belong to the BDSM community. It is a sense of approval!

Also, it might boost self-confidence, as a wearer might feel more attractive once they add it to their outfit.

And ultimately, it might increase intimacy between a couple since a collar represents their relationship and loyalty.

Will a Relationship Change Afterward?

The odds are that the relationship will change – on better! The sub will feel more protected and accepted. And the dom will feel more in control. But also responsible for the well-being of their partner.

What Is The Downfall of Collars?

The cons of wearing collars do not have much to with this piece of jewelry. Yet it has a lot to do with society and religion. BDSM is in conflict with religious beliefs. Thus, you might face shaming.

The Bottom Line

BDSM collars could be extremely fun and bring a lot of pleasure. I mean, the options of sexual play with them are almost limitless! Besides, they are a powerful mark that you are part of the community and a symbol of your relationship. So, if you think you are ready to wear one, or gift one to your partner, consider all we previously discussed. And then, step into a whole new exciting world!

You can learn more about the ” How to Use Blindfold During Sex? 10 Creative Ways to Use a Blindfold During Sex ” in our article.

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